Soulmates and Heartbreaks

“How did you find your soulmate?”

Since the day I got married, I have been getting this question in one form or other. People are interested to know if we ever fight or not. The scrutiny is more as we run an organization that talks about building meaningful relationships.

“Why did you get married to him?”

“Does he have all the qualities that you were looking for in a husband?”

These are some other forms of questions that people want answers to.

Frankly speaking, I had never ever imagined what my potential husband would be like. But yeah, I have had enough heartbreaks to know the kind of person I never wanted to have as my husband. I know he too has had experienced enough heartbreaks to understand the kind of person he wants to stand strong 24/7 with.

Finding each other and reaching to the conclusion of getting married isn’t that easy. We have to go through enough self-discovery to accept the fact that just like us, our partners also have flaws in them. We have to accept ourselves so well to finally admit that we can stand with that other in their thick and thin. Interestingly, most of the times, the journey of self-discovery and self-acceptance comes from heartbreaks, painful heartbreaks.

There are encounters with thousands of people but we connect only with hundreds. Out of hundreds, we are in touch with the fifties and then there are only ten of them whom you choose to share your pleasures and pains. Out of those ten, there is that only one with whom you can see yourself growing together with. It doesn’t mean that the others weren’t good enough for us or we weren’t good enough for them. Sometimes it’s about the distance. Sometimes it’s about dreams. Sometimes it’s about conversations and sometimes it’s about wellbeing.

Here, I would just like to stress upon the fact that Sagar and I are best friends, simply best friends trying to navigate the complex road of life together. We are two imperfect beings trying to walk an imperfect path holding each other firm because we know what it means to go through a heart break and walk alone.

Yes, it reads less romantic for a newly married couple but we understand the pain of romantic heartbreak. We are just growing into each other every day, trying to learn something new about each other moment to moment, trying to help each other become better versions of ourselves.

A note of reflection; we have found each other not because we went in search of our soulmates rather by being aware and learning after each heartbreak. Heartbreaks, sometimes by a person and sometimes by fate.