Legacy for our Children

Photo credit; clchild

Few days back, I was on a public bus. A woman was sitting next to me with her toddler. It seemed that her baby had just started to utter some words in an impenetrable way. First I thought she was trying to say 'mummy' and didn't care much. Later, I realized, it was something different. She was trying to say 'madise'. I thought I was mistaken but may be I had a strange look listening that, the mother with a smile said, achel ghar ma dherai yehi bisayema kura huncha, ani nani le pani yehi bhaneko bhanai garche. (Now a days, there are so many discussions about Madhesh, so she picked that word from that) And that gave me a bang on my head and it started juggling with the term 'madhise' she was saying. She should have picked the word 'Madheshi'. That hinted she had only heard the derogatory term used for Madhesh in her surroundings.

With this, I thought of knowing what my children are thinking on the prevailing context and asked my students (aged not more than 12) in one of my classes. As talking about the political issues with small children is a bit difficult, I was trying to wave the words in an understandable way. But before I could say anything one of the boys said, "miss madise haru le ta hamro desh khayo ni hau?" (The people of Madhesh engulfed our country). Then I asked him to justify his answer on which he said, "I am telling what I have heard miss." Then I said him demanding rights don't necessarily mean engulfing the country. As a citizen we all have equality and have right to voice for our needs."

Then another asked, "In the name of their right, don't they have to think of pahade's right?" Umm…thank you for your question but your question has a mistake, it's not about pahade's right or madheshi's  right only, no one has the right to harm other's right for the sake of owns. What is important is whether we demand our right or use our right we must think about others rights as well." I said to him. Then the question and answer shifted towards rights and ways on getting our right and so many other issues like the blockade, shortage of goods and so on. I tried to satisfy them with balanced answer neither talking in favor of Madhesh nor Pahad but about the importance of right to everyone. That conversation made me realize that, those children were not speaking their point of view but were taking out just those things that they have heard these days.

I teach the students of hilly area, so the point of views were against the people of terai region and what I am sure is if we talk with the children of terai region, we will definitely find the point of view against the people of hilly region in the present context.

Most research on human development agrees that the historical era in which late childhood and early adolescence are spent is also one of the most important determinants of a child's development. Social constructivism is a paradigm in developmental psychology that characterizes learning as a process of actively constructing knowledge through an interaction between the knowledge they bring to a situation and social or cultural exchanges within that content.

I remember most of the friends of my batch even now intentionally or unintentionally calling 'dhoti' whenever they see someone from the terai origin. We picked up the term as we were grown up on the same culture and surrounding when we were child. The context changed and we grew up but our tongue still slips and we use the term. This may seem so small in the context of what problem the nation is going around today in the name of pahad and madhesh but this certainly has a role in igniting the fire of anger and hatred among us and resulted what we are facing today. The turmoil of madhesh is not new, though it is probably the longest one in the country's history. What I feel is if we had got the right information about these issues during our childhood, the situation wouldn't have turned worse. Now, we are repeating the same mistake.

Here, my point is not that we should change our perspective. But what is important is we must respect each other's perspective and also respect each other's identity. Most of all we must be careful when we are talking in front of or around our children on how we are speaking and what kinds of words and language we are using. One for their development and the other is that it is their right as a human to get the right information. Later, it's on their hand how they interpret it but our responsibility is to foster a good learning environment for them. 

We are tired of all these blood sheds, aren't we? So let's not do the mistake that our guardians did. We have already sacrificed a lot and to make it good, we are ready to sacrifice more for the future of our children. Let us create a generation where they can respect each other's existence. If we don't think about it now, definitely our children are going to see more blood sheds when they grow, which may not be only on the case of madhesh and pahad issue, but also on dalit, janajati and the issues of other minorities groups.

Preacher Billy Graham, rightly says, "The greatest legacy one can pass on to one's children and grandchildren is not money or other material things accumulated in one's life, but rather a legacy of character and faith.