Flaunting the Imperfect Stories (Story of Transformation 33)

“Let’s talk about imperfect bodies.”

Okay, let me start with myself.

I recently got diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS), in simple terms imbalance in hormones.

If you look at it simply, it’s just that your hormones are not functioning properly, but the consequences is really alarming. I gained 10 kilos of weight within a week and my face got covered with acne. And my doctor predicted that it may take couple of years to find a balance in my hormones.

I got worried.

No, not because of those weight and the acne. Yes, I felt bad about the sudden change but more than that the hormonal imbalance gave me million unnecessary mood swings. I started to get irritated easily and sadness started to haunt me.

It has already been three months and I am far better now.  You can find me happy and smiling again. But in these, three months, what people noticed was my extra weight and acne. They didn’t find that I had stopped laughing the way I used to. They didn’t see me going through that terrible stomach ache when I used to shiver even when I was talking to them. I had other several problems but every day I used to get suggestions of how I have to lose my weight because I am still single. They thought hiding aches should be my priority every morning because I could find my prince charming any time at any moment.

“Actually, why wouldn’t they suggest me that way?”

After all, we all, at least my contemporaries, all grew up reading and watching ‘Snow White’ and ‘Cindrella’. Every day there is a revelation of products that would hide our acne.

But, this incident took me back to my undergrad days when I was slim, umm! Actually thin. People would always suggest me to eat and gain some weight and again with the same purpose.

So, what is the perfect shape of our body?

What is perfection?

Google it.
Yes, we can for it gives us millions of wonderful definition of perfection.

Today, let’s hear the stories of imperfection.

She doesn’t want to reveal her name, but she shared “My first love said that his possibility of dating me would increase by 90% if I lost my weight. I didn't eat anything for a week and got really very weak; couldn't stand up, my legs would tremble.”

What a brilliant mathematician he seems to be!

But is that really his fault?

Diplove Gautam, Foundation Director at Bouddha Inn Meditation Center, considers that the thought of imperfection is an illusion, the self that our society creates for us. Unconsciously we become the victim of negative self-interpretation.

Roshan Dhungel, now, a Teach For Nepal Fellow shared an experience related to it.  “The thin lark body; never let me get out of my thoughts.”

The six packed tight body displayed in every hoarding boards and magazines made him question the body type girls would really get attracted for during his high school days. He kept on blaming himself for eating too much and working out less. The feeling went so deep that he started hating himself for not being able to attract anyone with his small face, long nose, and thin body with small arms.

Perfect body image is a constant issue faced by everyone, given how the standard of perfection is set by others. Every perfect or imperfect (whatever adjective you choose) body has a story to celebrate about. Kabeeta Shah, an undergrad student, felt sad when her tight stomach turned into a little fatty stomach after she couldn’t manage time properly for the sports that she used to play. However what she chooses now is fit body over a perfect or imperfect body these days.

Yes, flawless bodies share their own flawless story. But don’t you think those perfect stories are all made-up just as those photo shopped perfection. Because, in reality our life is filled with blemishes, scars, lumps, invisible pain and silence and all these somehow manifest in our body. And interestingly, while some people pinpoint your flaws, the other group of people crave for your features.

Asmita Gyawali, an MBA student, discloses her story of accepting her body in a beautiful way.

“I can state flaws of each and every part of my body; from my hair to my toes. Believe me, each and every part! But it is surprising to see how many girls come up to me and wish that they had features like mine. I never used to like my lips because they are uneven. My girl friends say that they'd want nothing else if they had lips like mine. Then, I started to accept that I have best of both world; a thin lip as well as thick.”

Accepting our body is about claiming our imperfect bodies completely. It is embracing the truth pain and joy that our bodies have carved in them and then transforming that into a story of what it means to live and walk around in that form.

Whatever we say, I agree that there are definitely going to be the days when we look at the full-length mirror and despise the reflection. But, the fact is we have it that way and we have to live with it then why not accept it and be happy. I would love to conclude my lines with those of Asmita’s, “I am to live with my body, why should I tire myself thinking constantly bad about it? I can just love it!”